Four months after leaving a two-month treatment program for her eating disorder, Kesha is opening up about her personal struggle in an essay in ELLE UK. I think it's extremely courageous of her to share such personal & difficult things with the world.
There is so much pressure for celebrities (and for all women) to look a certain way & to meet certain standards of beauty. It can really cause havoc on a person's mental state and self esteem. It's not an easy thing to deal with and Kesha took action to try to feel better, and I really admire that. I now have even more respect for Kesha knowing she has fought internal battles.
Here are some excerpts from Kesha's essay:
"That first day in treatment was the scariest of my life.. I worried about what people would think. I was here for an eating disorder—but I knew people would assume I was here for other things.. Sure, I've written songs about partying, but my dirty little secret is that I'm actually incredibly responsible. I take my music and career very seriously, and certainly didn't land in this situation from partying. But I was cut off from the outside world and I imagined people making up stories at a time when what I really needed was support.. I've always tried to be a crusader for loving yourself, but I'd been finding it harder and harder to do personally… I felt like part of my job was to be as skinny as possible, and to make that happen, I had been abusing my body. I just wasn't giving it the energy it needed to keep me healthy and strong."
"The music industry has set unrealistic expectations for what a body is supposed to look like, and I started becoming overly critical of my own body because of that.. I felt like people were always lurking, trying to take pictures of me with the intention of putting them up online or printing them in magazines and making me look terrible. I became scared to go in public, or even use the internet. I may have been paranoid, but I also saw and heard enough hateful things to fuel that paranoia."
"I felt like a liar, telling people to love themselves as they are, while I was being hateful to myself and really hurting my body.. I wanted to control things that weren't in my power, but I was controlling the wrong things. I convinced myself that being sick, being skinny was part of my job. It felt safer somehow."
On her time in rehab: